THE CHALLENGE STATUS UPDATE (published 6-27-2019)

This is a brief follow up to my 6/23/2019 article that mentioned “the challenge status,” of my interaction with a local atheist group. On 6/26/2019, Wednesday, the atheist show was again on the local TV channel. Mrs. Appalachian Irishman, Molly, and I watched. (Molly wasn’t too interested). The usual boring dribble started.

I almost changed the channel. Just in time, a guy called in! He asked, regarding my 6/19/2019 call in to the show and my debate challenge.

The caller questioned the two atheists – the older man, with whom I’d talked on 6/23/2019, and a younger atheist. He wanted to know the status of my debate challenge.

I listened, in glee, as the older atheist squirmed and made various points of reply. It was grand to watch a caller wonder why the older atheist hasn’t taken the next step yet! The caller was my “devil’s advocate!”

Well, as of this article, I have had no further response from the older atheist. I doubt that I’ll receive one! Who knows? If my “bionic” body can endure the asphalt and concrete, I may surprise the atheists at their local, weekly gathering spot that I know.

My purpose will be to help the atheists toward theism, eventually, to bring them to salvation through Jesus, by God’s grace.

Let’s see what happens!

THE CHALLENGE STATUS & AGE “6” BIRTHDAY SURPRISE! (published 6-23-2019)

The Challenge Status

6/19/2019, Wednesday: Mrs. Appalachian Irishman and I are home -- after my “rich, full” workday and after her final day of a two-day unpaid “training,” during her summer vacation from work.

We’re relaxing, with Molly on the couch between us. Channel surfing found the usual local access channel. The atheist show was on live this time!

Knowing me as I do, I had to call in, again. It’d been a few months since my last call in. I cut to the chase. I offered to engage them in a public, formal debate, with details to be of mutual agreement. Off the air, I swapped e-mail and phone numbers with the main atheist. To my surprise, he called about 9 PM, for about a 20-minute conversation. He seemed interested. He stated that he would post feedback requests from his group, on their websites (one on “Farcebook,” the other an actual site).

I expected to receive an e-mail from the man or, at least, to see where he’d posted his feedback requests on the websites. As of this entry, 6/23/2019, in the evening, I have had no further contact from the gentleman, nor have I seen any website postings.

We’ll see what happens!

Age “6” Birthday Surprise!

On 6/21/2019, Friday, the wife of a good friend, who is also a good friend, attained the age of “6.” (That was one day after my oldest sister-in-law attained Sammy Hagar age. Figure out the song!)

Well, today, we joined many others for a surprise age “6” birthday party for her! A fine time was had by all!

A person attains age “6” only once in a lifetime! Celebrate! We did! (Sorry, I didn't take any photographs.)

HOUSE MOUNTAIN #159 ON GRANNY WOOD’S BIRTHDAY (published 6-16-2019)

On Granny Wood’s birthday anniversary (in 1901) and Father’s Day, I did House Mountain hike #159! (It was hike #23 with “bionic” body parts.) I told you that I would! Enjoy the photos. I didn’t take a photo, as usual, of my new ol' truck. I was distracted, on leaving, by a young man from Alaska. He was using my passenger side truck windows as a mirror, to do whatever he was doing, to get ready to hike. He was a nice young man. Alaska has winter. Russia has winter. I don’t recall, exactly, when we had a winter, a real winter, here!

It’s the usual west bluff photo, with my trusty canteen in the shot. I made the hike up in 33 minutes. Well, before the “bionic” body parts, on a warm day, 25 minutes would be okay. My usual time is about 30 minutes now, with “bionic” body parts. The heat and wiping sweat slowed me down a bit.

This is the middle bluff, looking west/northwest. You’ve seen similar photos before, as I have taken many. I had a good breeze to cool me off. This view is for you, Granny Wood!

I had hiked up the west trail, then across the ridge east, to the middle bluff. I decided to hike the reverse, coming out. The photo above is the same west trail bluff, where you saw my canteen before. I have to take a different route every now and then!

6/15/2019 GAS UPDATE!

My one brain cell had a concussion, on 3/29/2016. That’s my excuse, at least, for writing this article!

The biggest news today is that the Weigel's Store in our thriving “metropolis” has been open since Wednesday! The old store was demolished, and a new, bigger, better store is now open.

I bought 100% gas for my new ol' truck today, for the first time since the old store closed and was replaced!

The across the way “Exxoff” won’t get anymore purchases of their 100% gas! The pump stands alone and is hard to get to. It’s progress for our little “metropolis!” (I found the photo, from their website, taken on 6/4/2019, while work was still in progress.)

 

6/15/2019 UPDATE - Life, “Such As It Is,” in Family Heritage

6/10/2019, Monday

Mrs. Appalachian Irishman is the eldest of three sisters. On this date, my middle sister-in-law found Sun Drop in 12-ounce cans, in 24-can sleeves, at “Food Crappy!” (They have “value every day” there, according to their too frequent commercials.) The local IGA had been stocking them, but quit, despite my complaint. Okay, so “Food Crappy” is the place to get Sun Drop again! I drink a Sun Drop, about every other week or so! I now have two 24-can sleeves of Sun Drop! That should last me several months!

6/11/2019, Tuesday

My paternal grandmother, Granny Ferrell, passed on to the next life, on this date, in 1971, after her husband, Papaw Ferrell, had passed, on 11/21/1970. I remember.

6/12/2019, Wednesday

The eldest daughter of my youngest brother and his wife became a teenager, at age 13! They, all four, including their younger daughter, celebrated a few days at the beach! Good! They needed some fun family time! (Oh, the SOB is still not found – yet. See my 6/9/2019 article.)

I am the oldest of four brothers. On this same date, my second oldest brother sustained an injury at home. He’s alive. He is, at least at this entry, still in the hospital, but he may get out tomorrow, on Father’s Day. That’s good. I'm glad that it wasn't a more serious injury.

6/16/2019, Sunday, Tomorrow

My maternal grandmother, Granny Wood, was born on 6/16/1901. One could not have had a better grandmother! On 8/12/1991, she joined Papaw Wood, who had preceded her, on 3/14/1983. I conducted Granny Wood's funeral and graveside services. Papaw Wood, was born on 9/4/1901. I remember all the family jokes, about how Papaw married an older woman! (Mom and Dad were married on 9/3/1959, one day before Papaw attained age 58.)

On 6/16/2016, I took my first steps (3 only), on a rolling walker, after having recovered well enough to do so, from the “multi-trauma” injuries that I sustained, on 3/29/2016.

On 6/16/2018, Mrs. Appalachian Irishman and I purchased mulch and other items, at a nearby mega store. I enjoyed using my slowly recovering right foot, right knee, and left shoulder, to move and carry the mulch!

June 16, 2019, is Father’s Day and the anniversary of Granny Wood's birth. If I have power in my body, you will see what I do tomorrow, with photographs!

LIFE CHANGES – HUNT DOWN THE SOB! (published 6-9-2019)

BACKLOG UPDATE

I didn’t mention this before. On 5/19/2019, Sunday afternoon, the “long-suffering” Mrs. Appalachian Irishman, her two sisters, our niece, and I ate dinner (or lunch, as the Yankees call it) at “O’Chuck’s.” It was for our 33rd wedding anniversary, on 5/16/2019, which was a workday for us.

Just after we had left the house, for our anniversary dinner, a fine neighbor -- male, age 70, and in good shape -- had a major heart attack, with no prior symptoms! He lived, thankfully. He returned home from the hospital, on 6/2/2019, with no surgery or permanent heart damage! He’s still around! Thanks, Lord, for sparing our good neighbor!

On 5/27/2019, Memorial Day, Monday, I called a fine Hawkins County neighbor, also age 70. He’s facing an upcoming, on 6/17/2019, surgery that should correct his problem. May it be so, Good Lord!

Later, on Memorial Day, I called my youngest brother. He was sickly. The next Saturday, 6/1/2019, I called him again. He had, and is still dealing with, double pneumonia! He still had a 101.9 degree fever! He’s endured all the missed work and doctor appointment “fun.” He's getting better. Please help him recover fully, Lord!

HUNT DOWN THE SOB!

 

6/2/2019 photograph, by my sister-in-law, of the white Ford POS, after the SOB hit the blue vehicle, in which my family were riding.

After I'd published the article of 6/2/2019, later that afternoon, my youngest brother’s wife and their two daughters were almost home from an errand. My youngest brother was still recovering at home. A SOB (not a swell ol' boy) -- tall, thin, white, short-haired, male (not a man) -- driving a white Ford POS (piece of stuff) -- was in their northbound lane, at an “S” curve. The SOB hit them head on! Airbags deployed. Thankfully, the three family members sustained only relatively minor airbag injuries. The SOB got out of the Ford POS and took off running, to hide. He’s not been found yet! The highway patrol, hopefully, is still trying to find him. The car that he was driving belonged to someone else.

The Morristown Citizens Tribune newspaper and the WCYB Bristol, Virginia, TV station had articles on their websites. The Rogersville Review, as of this date, has no article yet. Way to go, hometown newspaper!

This article is my online way of getting out the word! Look for the SOB, as described above! If you see him, please call the highway patrol or 911!

The SOB should be in jail! I have no forgiveness. The Good Lord has no forgiveness. The SOB could be forgiven, by all -- if he would man up, turn himself in, ask for forgiveness, pay his fines, and serve his time in jail! He may have gotten away with his “hit and run,” literally running off on foot, if law enforcement can't find him. He will not be able to hide from God, at the final judgment!

Conclusion

Ok, I’m done. Good evening, y'all. Life rolls on, such as it is.

I had to get this off my chest and in writing. Yes, I am righteously indignant. There is no sin in righteous indignation.

God, I'm sorry for using “SOB” and “POS!” Thank you for forgiving me.

6-2-2019: FROM USA TO RUSSIA TO FIJI

This is another article that I'd written yesterday. I'm publishing it today.

I think the year was 1998. The “long-suffering” Mrs. Appalachian Irishman and I were in our 5-year (1994 – 1999) mission work in Russia. While in the USA, on our annual Christmas time visit, we had met the new preacher and his family in my hometown. The daughter took an interest in being a mission intern with us. Other college students and she became summer mission interns. A young man and she “dell in fove,” as Archie Campbell would say, during their time with us in Russia. Well, the two married. They did a bit more mission work in Russia, but they ended up as missionaries in Fiji, where they, with their four sons, still serve today.

On 5/18/2019, her husband e-mailed several, including us, that his father-in-law had passed on to a better world. After a few e-mails back and forth, Mrs. Appalachian Irishman called the daughter, whose father had died. I also talked with this now fine adult, wife, mother, and missionary. Just over two decades have passed. Connection, by e-mail, has been in place, on and off, all these years. It was good to connect by phone, while she is still in the USA. She is heading back to Fiji soon.

At some point, may it be soon, Lord, there will be no sorrow, loss, or separation. Won’t that be grand?

6-1-2019: LIFE, SUCH AS IT IS, UPDATE

Well, 6/1/2019 is the official start of summer; even though, it’s been hot, dang hot, since 5/19/2019. I follow the Russian way of counting summer starting on 6/1/2019.

First photo: 5/5/2019, Stacy – sister-in-law; wife of Doug, my youngest brother, and fourth son of Earl and Betty (Wood) Ferrell – took a photo of new flowers on Mom and Dad’s gravesite. Good!

Second photo: Ariel Ferrell, oldest daughter of my youngest brother, and his wife, is in this photo of a good middle school basketball team! Urah! Great job!

Third photo: this is my bathroom. The Timex travel clock is the black item on the right. I replaced the AAA battery, to keep it running, on 5/28/2019! It had been so long, for a new battery, that I had figured that I “might as well get a new travel clock!” New battery is installed. The clock still works! Timex takes a lickin’ but keeps on tickin’, like me!

Oh, the other stuff are two of three radios. I can switch between news/talk, classic Rock, and supposed to be classic Rock (with dreaded Disco sometimes), while getting cleaned up, in the morning, for the work-a-day world. The other stuff is Mrs. Appalachian Irishman’s beach or candle stuff that I allow in my bathroom.

Final photo, on 5/30/19, Thursday: this is an example of one of many “fly killin’s” that I’ve done over the decades! That fly is a goner! I remember, over a decade ago, having a “fly killin’” contest with my youngest brother, at the homeplace. I killed 22 flies in one day! I think that was the record!

We go through life the best that we can. I’m still here. My permanent, much better, home awaits me. “Git ‘r done!”

Good Friday – Passover 4-19-2019

Good Friday was on 4/19/2019. As it happens at times, the date was also the first day of Passover. (See my 4/13/2019 article.)

Well, 4/19/2019 was rainy and windy, so, in wisdom, I did not go to the homeplace, to fire live rounds for target shooting.

Instead, yesterday, 4/20/2019, the “long-suffering” Mrs. Appalachian Irishman and I drove to the home of my youngest brother and family (wife and two daughters), in Rogersville. The four female folk did female folk things.

Doug and I, in his new-to-him Nissan Frontier, went to the homeplace. The weather was cloudy, windy, and off and on rainy, but not as bad as the day before. We stood back upright Granny Wood’s grapevine support that had fallen a few months ago. The grapevine is still living. Doug planted flowers in the flowerbed, near the front porch, in memory of Granny Wood and Mom.

Afterward, as a light rain began to fall, we both did a little target shooting! (That morning, I had predicted that rain would fall as we started to shoot.) I shot my new, replacement Ruger LCP for the first time. We only fired a few rounds, but we shot well. I shot better than I thought that I would, after my over three-year “sabbatical” from target shooting!

Unfortunately, I forget to take any photos. The photos are in my mind. It was a fine day.

I have checked off another goal. I have replaced my Ruger LCP and gone target shooting again! A next goal is to be able to run as I once did, before having the surgically installed metal in my left shoulder, right knee, and right foot. Lord willing, by my shear determination, I WILL do that one day!

4-13-2019: PAPAW FERRELL'S BIRTHDAY in 1880 & RUGER REPLACED

On 4/13/1880, my paternal grandfather, Marion Ferrell, was born. I wear his first name with honor, knowing the Irish meaning. The Gaelic is Merrion, which means “brave man.”

On 4/13/2019, I – his grandson, first son of his youngest son, my father, Earl Ferrell – purchased a Ruger 380 pocket pistol. (The “long-suffering” Mrs. Appalachian Irishman was with me.) The purchase was to replace the Ruger that I had bought on 7/28/2012.

On 3/29/2016, the TN Highway Patrol held that first pistol, for safe keeping, at their Knoxville location – due to the 18-year-old, uninsured female, who failed to yield to my right of way and almost killed me on that date.

The TN Highway Patrol called me a few times, to remind me that my old Ruger LCP 380 was at their Knoxville location – for me to re-acquire at any time that I wished to do so, up to one year. After one year, the TN Highway Patrol stated that they would destroy my old Ruger.

In early March of 2017, a TN Highway Patrol officer had called me and stated that they would be glad to hold my old Ruger, even over a year, if I wished to call them, before 3/29/2017, to make the proper arrangements. I thanked the very kind and understanding officer for her time. I never called to extend the pick up, due to all the “fun” in life. I had assumed that the TN Highway Patrol had destroyed my old Ruger. Later, I learned that my old Ruger may have become a backup weapon for an officer.

The last time that I had “pulled a trigger” was on 3/25/2016, Good Friday. I was at the homeplace. Steve (a lifelong friend), Monnie (neighbor), and I did some target shooting. We had a great day!

Good Friday is on 4/19/2019. What do you think that I plan to do, for the first time, since 3/25/2016?

Enjoy the photo of my purchase today!

HOUSE MT. #156, Saint Patrick's Day: 7 Humans and 3 Dogs! (published 3-21-2019; updated 7-21-2022)

Introduction

Well, well, my last article was on 6/14/2017. My how life goes by! Here I sit, plunking away again, finally, on 3/21/2019. Earlier today, my “long-suffering” wife had a medical appointment. It was for a minor problem that is resolved, thankfully. Both of us have a day off work. That's good! It gives me time to write.

My 6/14/2017 article was about my 5/14/2017 Mother’s Day hike on House Mountain (hike #138). As of Sunday, March 17, 2019, St. Patrick’s Day, I have hiked House Mountain 156 times. That is 20 hikes, so far, since I acquired my surgically installed “bionics” – metal pins and screws, in left shoulder, right knee, and right foot!

(I had to pause writing for a few minutes. About 3:30 PM, my “long-suffering” wife came back from visiting her folks, who live about 3.5 miles away. I'm back now!)

House Mountain #156

The following two photographs are from House Mountain hike #156, on 3/17/2019, St. Patrick’s Day Sunday! This was the first time that I have had seven humans plus three dogs hiking with me! The seven humans were my youngest brother, his wife, and their two daughters; our niece; and my wife and me. The three dogs were Molly (our doggy), my brother’s dog, and our niece’s dog. Enjoy the photographs!

By the way, life rolls on, day by day!

Dear Lord, let me die soon and easy, to go Home! My “bionic” joints are aggravating me too much!

What, Lord? Not yet?

Okay. Whatever.

I'll continue to endure my ongoing recovery. Hiking helps.

The photograph below is near the west bluff. Five humans and two dogs made it that far! (My wife, our niece, and our niece’s dog turned back at the first of the six switchbacks on the hike up.) By the way, a goat was on the bluff, as we came near it, on the hike up. My youngest brother, in manful form, chased off the “dangerous” goat!

 

The photograph below is at the parking lot – after the complete hike, by five humans plus two dogs! I see two Nissan Frontier trucks! Mine is the 2006, behind Molly and the information sign. My youngest brother’s is the 2017, on the left side, with tailgate showing.

Conclusion

We “rock ‘n roll” through life, by God’s grace, if He cares! Well, He does care. Sadly, God's providence allows bad things to happen to good people.

If the uninsured chicklet had been a few seconds faster or slower, on 3/29/2016, then she would not have hit my 1995 Nissan pickup and me. Providence allowed the event.

I get mad, at times. I think, “God, if you care, why didn't you prevent the uninsured chicklet from killing my truck and almost killing me? A few seconds earlier or later would have helped!”

God allows bad things to happen to good people, in this temporal realm. He knows that the good folks, who are saved by his grace, will have joy, in heaven, our everlasting home. I continue to endure, with that thought in mind. Hiking helps – especially with family, on St. Patrick's Day!

5-14-2017: Mother's Day & House Mt. #138 (published 6-14-2017; updated 7-21-2022)

 

 

 View from the west bluff, looking southeast.

 

 

 

 The west bluff: the rock that I touch to mark my time is to the left of my trusty ball cap and canteen.

 

 

 View from the upper middle bluff, looking northeast.

  

My faithful '06 Nissan Frontier, awaiting my return, after my hike.

The day was Mother’s Day, 5/14/2017. The day also marked uncle Bobby’s birthday, in 1939. I haven’t met him, yet, as he died in 1941.

I made it up the west bluff, alone as usual, in 37 minutes. Getting over and thru a few downed trees in one spot slowed me down a couple of minutes. I made it faster than I thought, with still damaged right foot and knee. My usual time, on a hot day, is 25 or 26 minutes.

I started the hike at 12:27 PM, by coincidence or providence. 12/27/2000 was the day Mom died. My mother-in-law met my Mom, on 4/30/2017. My cousin, Retha, met Mom and many others, on 4/27/2017. This hike was in their memory and honor.

This 5/14/2017 hike was my first hike (#138) all the way up the ridge (of course, and across and back down) -- since hike #136, on 3/26/2016, Saturday. On 3/29/2016, Tuesday, I almost got to be with Mom, Dad, my Savior, and so many others, when the uninsured chicklet failed to yield to my right of way. (I had hiked the loop trails, at the base, on Thursday, 12/22/16. That was my first hike, since 3/26/2016.)

Every step I take hurts; I take steps. This hike #138 was for my Mom, uncle Bobby, my mother-in-law, and my cousin Retha! Of course, it was for me also. Now that I know that I can hike “My Mountain” – even if I’m not yet a “mountain goat” – by God’s grace and my own strong will – I will keep hiking!

HOUSE MOUNTAIN, #137 (published 12/22/2016; updated 10/3/2022)

10/3/2022, Monday: I updated by adding section titles only. I did not change a word.

House Mt. #136, 3/16/2016

My House Mountain hike #136 was on Saturday, 3/26/2016 – three days before my world changed for the bad, when the uninsured chicklet failed to yield to my right of way (mentioned in 12/8/2016 article).

House Mt. #137 (#1 “bionic”), 12/22/2016

Instead of hike #150 (which it would have been, by my estimate), I took hike #137 today, 12/22/2016. This was my first time on “my mountain,” since I was almost killed.

I hiked alone on the two little loop trails at the base of the mountain. One trail is 0.2 miles. The other is 0.35 miles, according to the signs. I hiked on uneven paths, down and up a few dips, and over a few fallen logs.

A man has to start somewhere. I cannot yet “mountain goat” up the side of the mountain, but I have taken my first hike. My surgically repaired right knee and foot (which is still swollen and scabbed) took the pounding well enough.

I rejoice that I could take this little hike on “my mountain!” Of course, the rocky bluffs are calling me. How much longer before I answer? Give me time. Today, the weather was sweatshirt warm and sunny, a little too warm for the time of year. Enjoy the photos.

PEARL HARBOR at HOMEPLACE (published 12-8-2016)

December 7, 1941. The mention of that date is sufficient. I was not yet born, but I have seen the film and photo footage. I have listened to the stories. I have seen the documentaries. I have heard my parents and grandparents talk about it. That date changed this country.

Yesterday was 12/7/2016, 75 years after that “infamous” day. The weather was sunny and seasonally cool. I drove my new, ol’ truck, an ’06 Nissan Frontier, to and from the homeplace, for the first time, since my ol' ’95 Nissan truck died, and I almost did, when chicklet failed to yield to my right of way, on 3/29/2016. That date changed my life, at least for these several months.

Yes, I have improved. I can walk well enough, and I can drive. I am not yet able to hike up a mountain. On 12/5/2016, I was medically “released” to return to work, on 12/19/2016. I will work two weeks part-time; afterward, I will be back to full-time.

Yay, rah. Ho hum. Okay. I am still alive, and I have recovered well enough to drive and to return to work. Don’t get me wrong. I am glad that I am out and about, going toward a normal, active life. I can see a finish line up ahead. The end of the marathon is in sight.

What’s wrong? The prolonged and ongoing recovery has been and is just a gritty process. It’s the reality of life. At least, I am going forward. (My stubborn, strong will has helped in this.) The deeper purpose in life is still missing. Yes, I will be a good husband, brother, uncle, and in-law. I will be a good neighbor. I will be a good coworker. Is there anything else? Pause. . . Wait. . . Oh well, we’ll see. In my 8/26/2016 post, I asked God: “Could you not open a door of complete physical healing and another door of opportunity to serve you, as I once did before you took Mom home? I await your reply and/or action -- as I have been doing since 2000, I do now still.” The long physical healing process, still ongoing, sees a finish line. What about the “door of opportunity?” We will see. Until then, I go back to being a bureaucrat in eleven more days.

To those, if any, reading, I wish you and yours a Merry Christmas. Maybe, I will take my long-suffering wife with me to hunt a tree on Saturday, if I am physically up to it.

I’M STILL ALIVE – WHY? (published 8/26/2016)

I almost died! I should have died. Why am I still alive?

The almost three year silence is now broken. I write on this blog again, to whomever may read it. Life the last two plus years has been the mundane: work, chores, hike, family and friends, eat, sleep, etc. Life was okay, if not wonderful. I lost interest in writing. Life was going through the motions.

Life, however, changed on 3/29/2016. My ol' ’95 Nissan pickup and I were on the way from the office to home. An 18-year-old, with no insurance, decided that I didn’t deserve the right of way, and she hit us. My ol’ truck died. I almost died. Two hospitals had me for 36 days combined. I am still unable to return to work. I am improving to the point that I’m slowly going insane, by not having much to do, being confined at home. So, now I write.

Today, by the way, would have been Granny and Papaw Wood’s anniversary! They married in 1931. How I miss them and the many others who have gone on to a better place.

Why am I not in that better place with them? Why did I not die on 3/29/2016? As the Russians say well, “Только Бог знает!” I still can’t work, drive, walk well, hike, do yard work, check on and do work at the homeplace, etc. I’m still here for my longsuffering and loving bride. (Our 30^th wedding anniversary was spent at home, with me still unable to walk.) I’m still around for brothers, some closer than others. If, however, I can’t yet do the things that I need to do or do the things that bring me joy (i.e., hiking, working at the homeplace, etc.), then why did I not die with my ol’ truck?

The above Russian phrase is “only God knows.” God only knows why I am still alive. He has decided to not inform me as to why. I was once an earthen vessel, in whom he had placed the glorious gospel message. I found joy and purpose in serving Him in fulltime ministry and then mission work. Life, however, changed when Mom went to see Jesus, after her yearlong illness and suffering. The “fire in my bones” was extinguished. I didn’t extinguish it. He did. For almost 16 years now, I have been going through the motions of living, with my ministry purpose taken from me.

"So, God, howdy. I’m still here! Since I’m still alive, could you not open a door of complete physical healing and another door of opportunity to serve you, as I once did before you took Mom home? I await your reply and/or action -- as I have been doing since 2000, I do now still."