Random Questions #2: Coping Sarcastically with Life's Realities (published 7-13-2026, article #565)

“Artistic Indecision 1” by Buddha Elemental 3D on Unsplash, 8/19/2024. Free to use under the Unsplash License.

Introduction

Just over 20 years ago, this witty barb penned Random Questions (published 6-3-2006). It was the second of four articles published on the same day. My, how time goes by! Welcome, dear reader, to the 124th entry in the Humor Topic Section.

The inspiration for this questioning treatise came from “Random Thoughts #82,” Professor Harold Black’s Webpage, by Dr. Harold Black, 7/9/2026. Dr. Black's website is one of three listed under the “Folks to Whom I Subscribe” section of this internet site. With rare exception, Dr. Black publishes a fresh article early every morning. I read each one, commenting at times. I may never catch up to his published 82 random thoughts since this is only my second “random questions” entry.

Random questions, however, pop into my mind daily. Don't they do to you as well? Remember, dear reader, sarcasm is an intelligent person's attempt to cope with the realities of life. The following is my recent attempt in four categories.

Commercials

What happened to the "My (huggy) Pillow" guy, Mike Lindell? His crass, pillow-hugging television commercials used to air during every commercial break on several channels. I don't miss the commercials, but I did laugh when I saw him hug a pillow.

Why are the United States and New Zealand the only two countries in the world that allow direct-to-consumer advertising of prescription drugs? The federal government banned cigarette advertising on television in 1969. From the 1960s through the early 1980s, there was a de facto ban on televised pill commercials. In August 1997, however, the federal government opened the floodgate for television drug commercials. Close the floodgate! The article from 2/15/2025 explains what I call “Pill Commercial Overload Syndrome (PCOS).”

As a follow-up question, for my next annual physical examination, should I take with me a list of drugs advertised on television and ask my doctor if each one is right for me? Finally, should my wife and I simply move to Ireland to escape the onslaught of drug commercials? I don't take any prescription medicine.

Why are car salesmen's commercials so obnoxious? Do they have to be so excited? Why can't they wear clothes that match? Why do they shout at me? I ain't buying!

Switching to radio, why do local radio stations play the same commercials over and over again? Can't they get other businesses to advertise?

How many folks do you know who are stuck in a timeshare? Chuck McDowell, the founder and CEO of Wesley Financial Group, thinks many of us are stuck in one. I switch radio stations when I hear his commercials. I ain't stuck!

How many gullible property owners want to sell their homes and land for less than the fair market value? Patrick Martin, founder, owner, and chief executive officer of Pro Source Home Buyers, thinks we all do. Television and radio stations lose me when his commercials air. We aren't selling! The article from 6/10/2025 presents our experience with the business.

Why do I need a safe but just don't know it yet? Mark Brasfield, the owner of The Safe House in Nashville, Tennessee, tells me so frequently in his radio commercials. I ain't buying!

Well, I could continue, but let's move on.

Classic Rock Radio Stations

Why do classic rock radio stations play far too many rock songs that are not classics?

Why do these stations play good classic rock songs so frequently that I grow tired of hearing them? I mean, for example, how many times do you want to hear about Tommy, who used to work on the dock, and Gina, who works at the diner?

Why do these stations play songs, especially on a Sunday, in which the singer is excited about being on the highway to hell or running with the devil? Does anyone really want to go to hell? I will continue to follow Jesus' instructions in Matthew 7:13-14.

Why are several great classic rock groups not included in station playlists? For example, where are The Bangles, Chicago, Dire Straits, the Electric Light Orchestra (ELO), the Go-Go's, the Pretenders, Santana, the Scorpions, Steely Dan, Supertramp, the Grateful Dead, Toto, and U2?

Where can I find a playlist that includes the bands mentioned above? Well, my iPod MWF Classic Rock station has them! I always listen to it while driving.

Is classic rock determined objectively? If so, who sets the standard? I can answer those questions if you ask!

Local Television Stations

How can every local television station be the most trusted, reliable, and accurate?

Is everything “breaking news”? Didn't they “break” the same news story yesterday evening or early this morning?

Why do these stations start off with a weather tease, only to return to the full weather forecast around ten minutes later?

Why do local stations show news segments from far-away states? Further, why do they show international news stories?

Why do these stations tell us that more information on a story is available on their website or news application (app.), which you can download? Why not tell us the full story now?

Why are we to be “weather-aware” only on certain days? I am aware of the weather every day, especially if I'm in the woods hiking.

Why do these stations constantly pitch for us to download their application (app.)? Do they earn money for each download?

Why do weather forecasters talk about upcoming weather, for example, “for your Tuesday”? Isn't it everyone's Tuesday? Why must they add “your”?

Finally, before going to a crass commercial break, why do the newscasters waste time by telling us, “What's coming up after the break”? Isn't that a tease? I am not laughing.

Politicians

This section separates politicians, who are many, from statesmen and stateswomen, who are few. A statesman or stateswoman is guided by the constitution, integrity, morality, and the common good. A politician, in contrast, is often focused on self-interest, party loyalty, and personal gain.

Should every politician be given a pacifier? Should they have their mouths washed out with soap daily? How often should their diapers be changed?

Do politicians running for office think that the number of mailings they send will influence me to vote for them? I glance at them before tossing them into the paper recycling.

How do political candidates get my cell phone number? Why do they text unsolicited campaign spam to my number? Do they not know how annoying it is? Don't they understand that it could turn me against them?

If it makes sense to turn right and go straight, why do politicians (and bureaucrats) think turning left and backing up makes sense? Don't they have any common sense?

When is “he's tough, like Trump” a good selling point for a political candidate for the Tennessee governor's office? Why not say “he's crass, like Trump”? Is Trump really tough, or is he a bully?

Why does a US senator from Tennessee want to step down to run for state governor? Wouldn't she serve the state better as a US senator?

Conclusion

Knowing that the previous random questions are largely rhetorical and sarcastic, you are welcome, dear reader, to comment and reply.

As the previously referenced 6/3/2006 article concluded, I likewise conclude. The glass is still half full. The meaning is that I remain an optimistic realist.

What say you?

Homeplace Visit, 6-16-2026: Quasquicentennial of Granny Wood's Birth (published 6-25-2026; article #564)

Introduction

Probably like you, dear reader, I didn't know “quasquicentennial” was a word until I found it in Old Man Webster's dictionary. It's a fancy word from Latin that means a 125th anniversary.

Welcome to the 109th entry in the Heritage topic section. My maternal grandmother, Granny Wood, was born 125 years ago on June 16, 1901. Ironically, ten years ago, I took my first three steps using a rolling walker on June 16, 2016.

On Tuesday, June 16, 2026, the “long-suffering” Mrs. Appalachian Irishman had a “high-dollar cut and paint” hair appointment at 12:15 PM. What did I do? I drove up to the homeplace to celebrate the 125th anniversary of Granny Wood's birth. I also celebrated the 10th anniversary of my first “baby steps” after the uninsured female caused the wreck on Tuesday, 3/29/2016.

My seven-minute and 28-second audiovisual record, talking and walking around in the yard, is embedded in the section before the conclusion. I hope you enjoy it.

Preliminaries

The weather was mostly sunny. A cool morning warmed to afternoon heat. At 11:03 AM, I left home in my venerable 2006 Nissan Frontier, with just over 201,000 miles on the odometer. I had already loaded yardwork tools into the truck bed. After driving just over an hour, I was hungry and made a pit stop at the local Hardee's to fill my tank. Registering full, I next bought products to kill stumps and brush at the nearby Tractor Supply.

Parking around back at the homeplace, it was 12:54 PM. The articles from 3/16/2026 and 3/27/2026 were about previous yard work at the homeplace. The article from 5/27/2026, about our trip to see family in Kingsport, mentions the yard work needing to be done. On this trip, I got the work done.

Yard Work

Using the battery-powered brush trimmer, I gave “haircuts” to the bush on the southwest side of the house and to the bushes near the lower driveway. Afterward, I used the manual trimmer for more exact trimming. The manual tree branch cutter came in handy to take down scrub tree regrowth in two locations. I also used it to cut a few low-hanging branches from other trees.

Aside from spending a few minutes indoors, I worked outside most of the afternoon. Wisely, I had changed into an old pair of short pants and T-shirt before starting the work outside. A large-brimmed straw hat shaded my face and neck. I soaked the work shorts and T-shirt with sweat. Wiping my forehead with a paper towel kept sweat from getting into my eyes.

After completing most of the work, I used a broom to knock down a few waspers and their nests from under the front porch ceiling. One of those devilish waspers stung me above my left ear! It smarted, and I stomped on the wasper. I felt the sting until going to bed that evening.

Not long after being stung, a neighbor from across the road drove over on his 4-wheeler. Fourteen years older than me, his feisty and good-natured spirit showed no sign of aging! We enjoyed visiting together.

Later, I changed back into my regular clothes and placed the sweat-filled yard clothes inside the truck cab. (My truck asked me to roll down the windows!) At 4:19 PM, a minute before starting the walking and talking audiovisual recording, I took the following photograph:

The view looks north. Granny Wood's grapevine and the metal frame that my father built are in the foreground. The clutter on the ground around the grapevine is what remains of the scrub tree that had started to grow back beside it. I had already trimmed the bush beside the house.

Could anyone recycle old rubber tires and metal rims? There are 22 tires. Eighteen are on rims. I would like to donate the tires and rims to anyone who wants to ask and arrange to come take them off.

Talking and Walking Around in the Yard

After taking the previous photograph, I started recording as I walked around in the yard. The wasper sting above my left ear must have affected me more than I thought! Listening to my recording later, I counted five times that I misspoke the wrong year, day, and direction. Thankfully, I dubbed in corrections to the audio and overwrote the transcript.

Thusly corrected, Appalachian Irishman – Podcasts (YouTube) presents Homeplace Visit, 6-16-2026: Quasquicentennial of Granny Wood's Birth (pub. 6-24-2026; episode 46). I let my wasper-stung head rattle off for almost seven and a half minutes. I started recording from behind the grapevine and walked toward the two Winesap apple trees that my father planted. Can you see the tree branch that I noticed on the roof while recording? Later, I talked about our old dog, Buddy, who passed away, and the remains of our 20-year Christmas tree. As I wrapped up, I asked if someone would like to ask my wife about the previous day's trip that she, her sister, and I took to Athens. It was all for $34.03!

I hope you enjoy the view and my impromptu words. I truly love and miss Granny Wood and so many other beloved family members who have left us for a better place. I expect to see them again in the eternal realm.

Conclusion

After calling my wife, who was freshly back from her two-hour “cut and paint” appointment, I left the homeplace at exactly 4:30 PM. After filling my truck's tank with 100% gasoline, the drive home continued until 5:51 PM. The total time away was six hours and 48 minutes. I drove exactly 120 miles and spent three hours and 36 minutes at the homeplace.

It was an uplifting day for remembering family heritage. I will always remember what I did on the 125th anniversary of Granny Wood's birth, which was also the 10th anniversary of my first “baby steps.”

Mission Work in Russia: Our Departure on Saturday, 10-1-1994 (published 6-20-2026; article #563)

Introduction

Do you remember the television show Candid Camera? It was funny and clean. From TV Guide: TV Shows: Candid Camera, we learn, “Candid Camera was a popular American hidden camera reality television series. Versions of the show appeared on television from 1948 until 2014. Originally created and produced by Allen Funt, it often featured practical jokes, and initially began on radio in 1947. The show was later hosted by Allen Funt's son, Peter Funt.”

Welcome, dear reader, to the 15th entry in the Mission Work topic section. The focus of this brief article is on our departure over 31 years ago from Nashville to Moscow, Russia, on Saturday, 10/1/1994. It includes a couple of candid camera photographs.

Inspiration for This Article

My “adoptive” sister, Carol Sue, inspired this article. Thank you, Sis.! She emailed me on Monday, June 8, at 10:55 PM. I saw it early the next morning. The email's subject line was “LOOK WHAT I FOUND!!! LOL!!!” The attachment is the first photograph below. It was a “Candid Camera” moment in time over 31 years ago! I had been exposed (no pun intended).

I left Carol Sue a voicemail the following Tuesday afternoon. With no reply, I reached her by phone on Thursday, June 11. (She was having difficulty unlocking voicemails on her cell phone.) Well, we laughed about the photograph below and caught up on life for almost an hour and a half. Even my wife, the “long-suffering” Mrs. Appalachian Irishman, spoke with Carol Sue for a while.

Carol Sue, I plan, Lord willing, to call you after publishing this article! I have to poke a little fun at myself by writing it!

Background to the Photographs Before Our Departure

The Covington and Bryant families were already in Moscow. My wife and I became the third family on the “Mission Moscow” team of Christian missionaries. Newly established churches were already in Moscow and the nearby city of Klin. My wife and I served exactly five years, from 10/1/1994 to 9/30/1999. The Covington and Bryant families returned stateside before us. Young missionaries, who participated in our college mission internships during the summers, arrived after our departure.

My wife and I chose to depart for Russia from the Nashville International Airport instead of the closer McGhee Tyson Airport, near Knoxville. We had already moved our belongings back to East Tennessee from Dexter, Missouri, where I served for two years as an associate minister while we prepared for overseas mission work. Before our departure, we stayed with my parents in Hawkins County and my wife's parents in Etowah, Tennessee.

Our decision to depart from the Nashville International Airport was under the assumption that members of our sponsoring church, the Dexter Church of Christ in Dexter, Missouri, would come to see us off. Sadly, not a soul from our sending church bothered to drive down to encourage us as we began our missionary journey.

Instead, four members of the Charleston Church of Christ in Charleston, Missouri (Facebook: Charleston Church of Christ), delighted and inspired us with their presence! Before Dexter, I had served as the minister in Charleston from 1986 to 1992.

Photographs Before Our Departure

This section includes four selected photographs, out of 25 that we have. The first two are candid camera shots! The final two show members of our church and biological families.

Candid Camera Shots!

While waiting for our departure, my “adoptive” brother-in-law, Michael, Carol Sue's husband, knew that I would use the restroom at some point. Literally behind my back, he took the following rather embarrassing image of me facing the urinal!

At least my pants were up! Yes, the hair on my head used to be black, not gray with a little black like it is now. As an aside, the last time I shaved my beard was on this day of our departure for Russia. I started growing the beard, which I have kept all these years since.

It is said that revenge is a dish better served cold. I wanted revenge! I waited. Michael was quenching his thirst with water. Nature called. He answered. Stealthily, I followed him into the men's restroom and took the following shot:

Wisely, Michael had chosen a stall! He knew what I would do! Hearing me snap the camera, he turned his head. I caught only his back, right arm, and cleft chin. I still laugh when I think about those candid camera moments!

Members of Our Church and Biological Families

Still awaiting our Delta departure time, someone took the following photograph of our church family from the Charleston, Missouri, Church of Christ:

From left to right are shown the church minister and his wife, Carol Sue, me, my wife, and Michael. Smiling, we were enjoying an unforgettable moment in time.

Michael, with his sly grin, must have been up to something. Apparently, my wife forgot to look into the camera.

The next photograph, taken by someone, was of our biological families.

From left to right in the back row were my father, my youngest brother, and my next-to-youngest brother. My younger brother, closest to my age, may have been working. His two daughters, however, were there.

The second row from left to right includes my mother, me, my wife's younger sister, and my father-in-law. The camera caused my sister-in-law's red-eye glare.

In the third row from left to right are my wife, her younger sister, and her mother. My wife was looking into the camera this time.

The final row shows our three nieces. Again, the camera caused the red-eye look for my brother's two girls.

My parents, my wife's parents, and our niece, standing between the other two nieces, have since passed away. We certainly miss them.

Conclusion

The time of our departure was at hand. The call to board was announced. Tears of sorrow from the imminent continental separation mixed with smiles and words of encouragement, love, and pride due to the cross-cultural mission work that my wife and I were beginning in service to our Savior.

Once seated at takeoff, we both began to feel the separation from loved ones. I recall saying, “This is it.” Our two years of preparation were finally being realized. We were on our way!

I recall that we flew from Nashville to JFK International Airport in New York. After a layover there, our flight continued to Sheremetyevo International Airport (Международного аэропорта Шереметьево) in Moscow, Russia. Moscow time is eight hours ahead of Eastern Standard Time. Due to the time difference and the layover, we arrived in Moscow the next day, Sunday.

The other two missionary families and members of the Lord's church in Moscow met us at the Moscow airport. Their warm greetings and excitement at our arrival uplifted and strengthened us.

Eventually, we arrived with our luggage at our apartment just off Tverskaya Street (Улица Тверская) on Trekhprudny Lane (Трехпрудный Переулок). Our second-floor apartment was in building 6, apartment 8 (дом 6, квартира 8). It was within walking distance to the Kremlin (Кремль) and Patriarch's Ponds (Патриаршие пруды).

Initially, the Covington and West families formed the Mission Moscow team. The Wests, however, departed before our arrival. The Bryants arrived a few months before us. During our survey trip to India and Russia in 1993, we stayed with the Wests in the same Moscow apartment. It was familiar to us.

At first, my wife and I felt out of place in the apartment, and we missed our stateside families. I noticed a chest of drawers, which had been under a mirror in the narrow hallway, was not where we remembered it to be the year before. I moved it back to where we remembered it being.

Doing that made us suddenly feel at home. I said, “We are home now.” My wife agreed. We became excited about beginning our five-year commitment to Christian missionary work in Moscow, Klin, and surrounding areas. The adventure had begun.

Hiking Big Ridge State Park, Sunday 6-7-2026: The Lake Trail (published 6-10-2026; article #562)

Introduction

The most recent article was about my Thursday, June 4th, hike at Norris Dam State Park. With memories of being down by the lake still on my mind, I chose last Sunday afternoon to once again explore Big Ridge State Park. It was my seventh hike there. My most recent hikes at the park are highlighted in the articles from 2/20/2024 and 2/22/2024.

Welcome, dear reader, to the 90th entry in the Hiking Topic Section! After morning worship, I could not persuade my wife, her sister, or our niece to join me in a hike at Big Ridge State Park. Thus, my vintage 2006 Nissan Frontier and I went alone.

Will you join me as we hike the Lake Trail? We may even take a brief offshoot trail to see what we can find. Let's hike!

Big Ridge State Park

Before hiking, let's find out more about the park. The Tennessee Valley Authority (TVA) established the park in 1949. Previously, the area consisted of rural communities, homesteads, and farmland. Imagine what it was like living in the area a hundred or more years ago.

The park got its name from the numerous ridges in the area. Should it have been named Big Ridges State Park? The park includes several ridges.

The park covers 3,687 acres. The 45-acre Big Ridge Lake is a primary feature. Further, the park has access to Norris Lake. At the lake, visitors enjoy swimming, fishing, and boating on the tranquil water. A sandy beach alongside Big Ridge Lake provides sunbathing and swimming. For children, an enclosed, concrete-bottomed shallow area provides extra safety.

At least 12 hiking trails, several of which connect, range in length from a tenth of a mile to 2.65 miles and in difficulty from easy to challenging. Back-country camping, camper hookups, and cabins are available for overnight stays. (At the time, all cabins were closed for renovations and should reopen this fall.)

Well, enough about the park. Let's hike!

My truck and I left home at 2:12 PM and drove the longer route along Norris Freeway (Hwy. 441) to Anderson Hwy. (Hwy. 61). Forty-four minutes and 29.5 miles later, at 2:56 PM, I parked in the parking lot near the visitor center. The parking lot was nearly full.

Hiking the Lake Trail

Clothed in short pants and a T-shirt, I walked a few yards southwest past the parking lot to the southwestern entrance to the Lake Trail. I wore a ball cap and my warm-weather hiking shoes, and I had my trusty canteen full of water with me. My small hunting knife was strapped to my belt. I decided to hike the 1.8-mile Lake Trail, which meanders around the lake.

Looking west, I took the following photograph at 3:03 PM before starting my hike a minute later:

I bypassed the tenth-of-a-mile Meditation Point Trail since I didn't need to meditate. The trail is wide enough for a four-wheeler, if one were allowed on the trail, and well-kept. The trail gently ascends, descends, and turns. I passed a couple of family groups, resting at benches along the trail. A boy said, “Don't come back here!” I think he was answering nature's call!

At 3:16 PM, after hiking about six tenths of a mile, I reached the connector to the Loyston Overlook Trail and took the following photograph:

The view looks northwest. I decided to venture onto the 0.25-mile trail. Initially, it was a wide and easy trail until it narrowed and started up the ridge. There, the trail was narrow and steep, reminding me of House Mountain. Be careful not to slip and slide down the ridge!

The Loyston Overlook Trail leads up to Loyston Pointe at the top of the ridge. A trail sign said that the location “offers views of the widest part of the Loyston Sea on Norris Lake.” Views, of course, are better in late fall, winter, and early spring, while trees are barren of leaves.

At Loyston Pointe, I took the following photograph, looking northwest, at 3:26 PM:

As you can see, the foliage blocked much of the view. Can you spot the rippling water from the boat that was passing by?

After hiking carefully back down to the Lake Trail, I continued westward to a footbridge that spans a lake inlet. From the bridge I took the following two photographs at 3:46 PM:

The image above looks east toward the park entrance.

The above image looks west. Folks in the watercraft were enjoying time on the lake. The hike started off under a mostly sunny sky, but clouds, as in the view above, thickened. Humid, the temperature was in the upper 80s Fahrenheit. A warm breeze from the south blew at times.

Three minutes later, having crossed the bridge, I took the following two photographs:

The above close-up shot faces northwest. The article from 2/22/2024 mentions that I took the Dark Hollow Trail and found the campsite where my wife, our niece, her friend, and I camped out overnight on Saturday, 10/4/2008.

The above image shows the northwest entrance to the bridge and looks southwest.

This time, instead of taking the Dark Hollow Trail, I chose to continue north and east along the remaining 1.2 miles of the Lake Trail. The section, still wide and well-kept, continues to twist and turn around the lake and head toward the northern entrance to the Lake Trail.

At 4:08 PM, I photographed another trail sign.

Deciding not to visit the Snoderly Cemetery, which I have done before, I stayed on the Lake Trail.

Ten minutes later, a tenth of a mile away from the end of the trail, I photographed another trail sign.

After taking the above photograph, a young man passed behind me. We exchanged brief greetings. Aside from the families, whom I passed early in the hike, he was the only other person I saw in the woods.

Shortly after the previous image, my wife called my cell phone, which was clipped to my belt. At home, she was thinking about supper and wanted me to buy ranch dressing on my return trip. Dear, you should have hiked with me!

At 4:21 PM, I photographed the northern entrance to the Lake Trail. I had just hiked out of it.

I apologize for the slightly crooked shot. The posts were straight. I held my cell phone camera crooked!

I walked the paved Group Camp Road for about two-tenths of a mile, crossed the picturesque field, and paused to photograph the Norton Grist Mill. The time was 4:27 PM.

Choosing not to go inside the mill this time, I crossed the footbridge and started hiking south and west along the quarter-mile Ole Mill Trail. It runs below a road and above the lake. The trail is narrow, fairly level, and rocky. Watch your step on the rocks!

The Ole Mill Trail comes out at a cabin area. From there, I continued southwest and passed a picnic area and the Historic Assembly Hall. Just past it was the beach area.

At 4:43 PM, I snapped the following two shots of the beach area:

The above view looks northeast. As you can see, many folks were enjoying the lakeside beach and sand.

The previous image looks northwest. The concrete-bottomed shallow area for children, not visible in the shot, is to the left. A few yards above and to the left of the shot is where the restrooms, changing areas, and covered picnic area are located. The parking lot, where my truck awaited me, is farther to the left.

Conclusion

Once back to my truck, the time was 4:45 PM. By my calculation, I hiked about three miles and enjoyed an hour and 41 minutes in the woods, mostly alone. Any part of a day in the woods is better than not having been there!

Before getting into my truck, I changed from the sweat-filled T-shirt into a dry one in the cab. My truck thanked me. The sweaty T-shirt dried on the passenger-side floorboard.

The drive back home started at 4:48 PM. On the return, I drove out and up east on Highway 61 to Maynardville Pike (Hwy. 33). Going uphill around at least three sharp curves, the back end of my truck almost met the front end! I don't like those curves. This shorter drive back home took 21.4 miles in 38 minutes.

In total, I was out of the house for three hours and 14 minutes, factoring drive time and time in the woods. Who wants to explore Big Ridge State Park with me the next time?

Hiking Norris Dam State Park, Thursday, 6-4-2026: Down by the Lake (published 6-6-2026; article #561)

Introduction

Had it been since 2024 that I hiked the trails at Norris Dam State Park? I reckon so. My hiking record and the article from 10/23/2024 indicate that my last visit was on Tuesday, 10/22/2024. I thought that was last year. My how time flies.

Welcome, fellow hiking enthusiast, to the 89th entry in the Hiking Topic Section. This article is about my 25th hike at Norris Dam State Park on Thursday, 6/4/2026. I went down by the lake, recorded an audiovisual clip, and took a couple of photographs. As a sidenote, when I added this hike to my hiking record, I realized it was my 270th since 4/23/2000, when I started logging hikes for at least 19 different locations.

Let us first set the background. Last Thursday started off quite busy. For at least three days, however, I had the itch to hike. Despite the day's earlier busyness, I scratched the itch!

Background

First up last Thursday, around 8:40 AM, the owner of Mitchell's Pest Control came by for a monthly spraying. The business is one of the eight recommended under this website's section, Business Recommendations: Northeast Knox County, TN. For almost three years, Mr. Mitchell has been providing us excellent monthly service at a reasonable cost. For example, rarely do I find a stray spider or spiderweb in the garage. As an added benefit, Mr. Mitchell and I enjoy joking and also talking spiritually with each other.

With that behind me, I still needed to scratch the hiking itch. Before doing so, however, my 2006 Frontier took my wife and me to the local post office and back. She had to mail a package with tracking related to her deceased father's estate. Remember, dear reader, ensure that you have a will. Further, be sure to name at least one beneficiary if you have a company 401(k) plan.

Having done that, I still needed to scratch the hiking itch. Before doing so, I helped the “long-suffering” Mrs. Appalachian Irishman complete her online application for Social Security retirement. She had been working on it, off-and-on, since Monday. After roughly an hour online, we submitted her application. It worked this time! What should have been a fairly simple process was far too complicated. What else would you expect from a federal “guvrmint” that is here to serve you?

After that success, I still needed to scratch the hiking itch. Well, my wife and I were hungry. We fixed and ate our noon vittles at home. After eating, I offered my wife the opportunity to come with me to hike either at House Mountain or Norris. What did she decide to do? She chose to visit her sister, who lives nearby at their homeplace, and help find the dead critter that was stinking up the garage! Well, I offered.

Hiking Down to the Lake

Finally, after all the above, last Thursday, I scratched the hiking itch! It was 2:05 PM before I left the house in my vintage truck with almost 201,000 miles on the odometer. The one-way drive northwest from the house to the spot where you start to drive across Norris Dam from the northeast side is right at 25 miles or about 40 minutes. I drove further southwestward across the dam and up to the Marine Railway Loop Trail trailhead. If you enlarge the Norris Dam State Park: Park Map, you can find the trail.

The early morning low of 52 degrees Fahrenheit had already warmed into the 80s. With a dominant high-pressure system, the sky was clear and brilliantly blue. I wore a T-shirt, short pants, and ball cap (to protect from ticks and the sun). My trusty canteen filled with water was across my right shoulder, and my rugged warm-weather hiking shoes protected my feet.

From the Marine Railway Loop Trail trailhead, around 2:54 PM, I first turned left, northwest, onto the Chuckmore Trail. (The sign said that it was steep and difficult. I like steep and difficult.) Not very far along the trail, a startled deer jumped up to my left and ran off! It was only a few yards away from me. I wish I could run that fast.

I stayed on the Chuckmore Trail until it surprised me by coming out onto Village Green Road. The trail crosses the road and continues southwestward. From Village Green Road, I decided to turn east and walk back along Hwy. 441 to my truck. Arriving around 3:15 PM at the same trailhead, I had to explain to my truck what I had done.

Deciding correctly this time, around 3:20 PM, I turned right at the trailhead and continued down the Marine Railway Loop Trail! (Always turn right in life.) After about 1.2 miles, around 3:40 PM, I reached the cutoff that leads to an island. The hike down was easy. The trail is wide and not very washed out. The tree canopy shaded me from the hot sunshine. I didn't see any poison oak or ivy, but I did walk through a few spider bridge lines and swat away pesky flies and gnats. As an aside, my hiking record indicates the last time I hiked this trail was on Saturday, 6/2/2018. I hiked the entire 4.4-mile trail. After the hike, I found and removed a tick from behind my right knee. I didn't publish any articles in 2018.

Down by the Lake

With Norris Lake water low, I could walk across the exposed sandbar to the small island. If the water is high, you can't reach the island on foot.

After exploring the island for a few minutes and enjoying the view, I decided to stop on the east side of the island. It faces Norris Dam, which was far off in the distance.

Feeling the need to gab for a while, I decided to record an audiovisual episode for my YouTube channel, Appalachian Irishman – Podcasts. It is titled Hiking Norris Dam State Park, Thursday, 6-4-2026: Down by the Lake (published 6-6-2026; episode 44). I started recording the episode, just over six minutes long, at 3:50 PM. As asked in the description, “Do you think my wife's decision to help her sister find a dead critter in the garage instead of hiking with me was wise? Further, do you agree that the boat that came by should have been playing classic rock music instead of country music?” You are welcome to comment on the episode, on this article, or on both!

At 3:57 PM, just after I finished recording, I took the following photograph, still standing where I was recording:

The view looks east. Norris Dam is visible in the background. The audiovisual episode, mentioned above, includes panoramic scenery and the sounds of watercraft going by.

Hiking Back Up from the Lake

At 4:00 PM exactly, I stepped from the sandbar onto the cutoff and started hiking back up the Marine Railway Loop Trail, down which I hiked earlier. The ascent is not terribly steep, but it is slightly challenging. Walking fast, I tried to increase my heart rate for better cardiovascular exercise.

Twenty minutes later, I returned to the trailhead and my old truck. I took the following photograph at 4:21 PM:

The entire Marine Railway Loop Trail is 4.4 miles, returning to the same trailhead. Will I return to hike the entire trail? Will my wife hike it with me? We will see.

Conclusion

My total time in the woods and on the island last Thursday was only an hour and 26 minutes. Any part of a day spent in the woods, however, is better than not having been there!

This article is published on D-Day. Eighty-two years ago, the landing took place. Previous statements about D-Day are found in the articles from 6/6/2020, 6/8/2021, and 6/10/2024.

In closing, I pause, remain silent, and remember the sacrifice of the soldiers on D-Day, 1944. I hope you do the same.

Mrs. Appalachian Irishman: 25 Years of Teaching (published 6-2-2026; article #560)

 

 

 

 

 

Close-up photographs by M. Fearghail, on Wednesday, 9/14/2022, at 1:15 PM. I had placed the Playmate Igloo cooler on our subdivision road near our driveway.

Introduction

Given the title of this article, why am I showing the above front and back images of a Playmate Igloo cooler? The conclusion will explain.

Welcome, dear reader, to the 140th entry in the Family Topic Section! My wife, the “long-suffering” Mrs. Appalachian Irishman, has retired from full-time teaching after 25 years. This article honors her service as a teacher.

The Historical Context

To set the historical context, on Thursday, 9/30/1999, my wife and I returned from five years of Christian missionary service in Russia. While transitioning back to stateside life, my mother's unexpected and serious health condition in December blindsided us. Hospitalized initially in Rogersville on Tuesday, 12/28/1999, by God's grace, she recovered well enough to return home on Saturday, 4/15/2000, after two subsequent hospitalizations in Kingsport. Mom was hospitalized a total of 110 days.

Forestalled was our prayerful plan to transition into stateside, church-planting mission work somewhere in East Tennessee. We needed to live no more than roughly an hour's drive away from both sets of our aging parents, especially my mother. Thus, we took secular employment after my mother returned home from the hospital. For less than a year, my wife worked for JCPenney. Located in the Knox Center Mall, the store was within walking distance from our Knoxville apartment. We only had one vehicle, a 1988 Nissan Stanza, which I used to drive to and from my job in Powell.

On Thursday, 3/22/2001, we bought our truck, a 1994 Nissan XE. The next Monday, 3/26/2001, my wife started teaching at Parkway Academy in Sevierville, Tennessee! Her younger sister, next in age to her, was already teaching there. My wife started teaching special education students.

My Wife Retired after 25 Years of Teaching!

The years and the miles rolled by. Until the end of the 2021-2022 school year, my wife and her sister carpooled. (The conclusion explains how we figured out which year.) Each one drove two or three days a week. The one-way trip was approximately 32 miles and took at least 45 minutes, depending on traffic.

In time, my wife switched from teaching special education students to teaching science. Later, when a vice-principal position became open, my wife was offered and accepted the position. She started serving as both a teacher and a vice-principal.

During 25 years of teaching, my wife received the teacher of the year award several times. Despite occasional frustrations with students, their parents, and coworkers, she enjoyed teaching.

Hopefully, my wife helped several of her students learn how to “turn right and go straight” in life. As an example, the article from 6/15/2022, about our car-buying experience, mentions my wife's reacquaintance with a young man who had been one of her students. He was a salesman at the dealership and appeared to be “turning right and going straight” in life.

Last Friday, 5/29/2026, was the last day of the school year for the teachers and staff. The students were already on summer break. On a half-day, my wife called just after 11 AM to say she was on her way home. The day marked not only the last day of the school year but also my wife's final day as a full-time teacher. She has now joined me in the retirement phase of life.

Dear, I am proud of your service as a teacher to children in Sevier County. Surely, you helped an unknown number along the right path.

What Will She Do Now?

Normally, yesterday, Monday, 6/1/2026, would have been the first day of my wife's two-month summer break with a return to teaching in early August. The day, however, was her first day of retirement. As an aside, Monday was also the first day of meteorological summer and the 230th year of Tennessee statehood.

On Monday morning, my wife helped with the usual Monday dusting, sweeping, and vacuuming, which I have usually been doing alone. Early that afternoon, as usual, she left to visit with her sister, who lives nearby. Finally, to my shock, she had a 3:15 PM annual appointment with her gastrologist! Outside and away from the phone, I missed her 2:25 PM call. Once inside, I called her around 3 PM. She was already at the doctor's office! Her explanation was that she had suddenly remembered the appointment while visiting with her sister. At least she didn't fail to tell me about the appointment.

This morning, my 2006 Nissan Frontier took both of us to an ophthalmologist's office down Chapman Highway. In late March, on the day that would have been her father's 88th birthday, she discovered a sty inside her lower left eyelid. Visits to and prescriptions from her primary care provider and an optometrist did not completely vanquish the sty. After the preliminary examination and vision test, the ophthalmologist determined that her sty was gone! Both eyes were fine. The itch in her left eye could be from the eye drops she was using.

Perhaps I will coax the “long-suffering” Mrs. Appalachian Irishman into writing another article, reflecting on her 25 years of teaching in Sevier County. After all, she, as a coauthor for this website, has only written one article so far. It was 'MATER FUN with 'MATER LADY (published 8-29-2022; article #351; Mrs. Appalachian Irishman article #1). Dear, this is the 560th article on this website. I have written 559 of them. Will you write at least one more? I imagine that you have stories to share about teaching.

Otherwise, we will see what she decides to do. I may nudge her into taking a few day trips. Retirement is not vegetation (i.e., inert existence). The article from 5/15/2022 is about the start of my retirement. I have been keeping very active. Chores around the house, neglected during my working years, are being done. I hike as often as I can. Further, I enjoy writing articles on this website. Finally, I look for opportunities to minister as doors open to me.

Conclusion

So, why does this article include the front and back images of a Playmate Igloo cooler? Well, allow me to explain.

Since 1994, I have been writing brief notes about daily events in desktop calendars. I could not find, in recent calendars, where I jotted down when my wife's younger sister retired from teaching. I was trying to figure out how many years my wife had been driving to and from work alone. Thankfully, my wife recalled that she started driving alone in the August 2022-May 2023 school year. Her sister, thus, retired in May 2022.

How did she figure it out? She remembered that it was around the time that she hit the Igloo cooler! I took the two photographs above and started a draft article for my wife to finish about the incident.

You see, on Tuesday, 9/13/2022, at about 6:35 AM, my wife called. She was minutes away from the house on her way to work. In the morning darkness, on Ellistown Road, she ran over an Igloo cooler. At the time, I was up, making coffee and breakfast. Quickly, my 2006 Frontier took me to the location. In the darkness, I managed to dislodge the Igloo cooler out from under our car. Our 2012 Sentra was not damaged. It wasn't funny at the time. It is funny now. By the way, I gave my wife a “deadline” to finish the draft, which I started, no later than Saturday, 10/15/2022. She never bothered to finish it. The story, however, is now told in this article!

The title of the draft article, which my wife never finished, was simply going to be “Playmate Igloo Cooler, 0; 2012 Nissan Sentra, 1.” Now, dear reader, you know “the rest of the story!”