In my last
article, I promised that my next (this) article would be more
entertaining. It has taken me a while to get here, but here I am!
With apology to Shirley Temple, “let
me entertain you! Let me make you smile!” Don't worry! I know
May 31st was Memorial Day and Sunday was the anniversary of D-Day. My
serious article on those follows this one.
You might want to click the links, for
some side-click fun! That's why I set the links. The banty rooster was
still growing, apparently. He sounds like me, when my voice was
changing, when I was about age 12.
Crowin' Like a Banty
Dad used to tell me, when I was
“feelin' my oats” and “braggin' a bit,” that I was “crowin'
like a banty rooster.” Sometimes, he said it when he was proud
of me. Often times, he said it to “bring me down a notch.” I
think that Dad would like the crowin' I do below!
On 5/2/2021, Sunday, I ordered my
decorative license plate and frame. $35 well spent! On
5/11/2021, Tuesday, I bought and own my “Appalachian Irishman”
website logo. $40 well spent. The image, above, is my website
logo. (I am not using it, yet, on the main page of my website.) I had
to buy my logo for the decorative license plate. On 5/19/2021,
Wednesday, I received my decorative license plate and frame. The
license plate has my logo (above) on it.
On Sunday afternoon, 5/23/2021, I
finally got around to placing my decorative license plate, with my
logo, on the front plate holder of my new ol' truck! I will
publish an image of my truck wearing his new decorative plate and
“tars” (below) eventually.
Okay, Dad, I'm done crowin' now! Are
you proud of me? I thought so.
“Tars” for my New Ol'
“You need you some new 'tars,' son,”
as Dad would have said. Yes, Dad, I have known that my new ol' truck
('06 Nissan Frontier) was needing a new set of “shoes.” The “tar”
tread was getting thin enough. I've kept the song “Pardon Me Roy,
is that the Cat that Chewed your New Shoes?” in my mind recently.
Do you hear, “Pardon me truck, it that the road that chewed your
new tires!” I do!
On 5/18/2021, Wednesday, I asked the
Lube in the Halls area of Knoxville to order the set of four
“tars” that I had selected.
They look like good “tars.” Cooper
Tires are make in America. You do not want to know the price. You
can't buy a good set of “tars” for $50 a “tar” anymore. “A
dollar ain't worth much now a days.” The “tars” arrived.
On 5/22/2021, Saturday, Mrs.
Appalachian Irishman and I had a little fun. My fine barber and
friend, at Tony's
Best Clips, gave me another great haircut, while we regaled
ourselves in several conversational points. Afterward, at 11:45 AM, I
arrived at the Express Lube, in hope of having my new “tars”
mounted and balanced.
Mrs. Appalachian Irishman was in line,
awaiting an oil change on our '08 Honda Civic. I knew that she had
planned the oil change. Her car got an oil change.
They were, however, too busy, with oil
changes and others getting new tires. I could have left my truck,
gone home in the car with wife. Later, we could have gone back, to
get my truck, once they had been able to get the tires mounted and
balanced. No deal!
I had arranged, on 6/3/2021, when
working at office, to work from home the next day. On 6/4/2021,
Friday, I worked from home (instead of office), took time off from
work, and got the tires on my truck! It was an Appalachian Irishman
victory – despite my “bionic” whatevers. (The poles outside the
tire shop area helped me stretch out my left shoulder, down left
side, to left hip. My right foot took the pavement pounding, while
fussing at me.)
Molly! Good “Puppy!”
The image below is our “good ol'
puppy,” Molly! She and I were hiking, on 11/26/2015. She was almost
a year old then. She still looks about the same now, at age five
going on six. Well, she has adult dog weight now, but Molly is still
On 5/24/2021, Monday, my wife and I had
our usual chiropractic adjustments. I had been needing mine over a
week! Dang, my left shoulder, to middle back, to left hip, etc.! With
apology to Survivor, “the
Burning Heart,” it's me against me; it's the paradox that
drives me on. When the “whatevers” rise up, as lately, I beat
them down, again, as usual.
Anyway, after having arrived home,
Molly was too busy in the back yard to “come see the man.”
Instead, once we were inside, I happened to see Molly! It was about 5
PM. She was in our “back 40.” A yearling deer made the mistake of
visiting. Molly, running in “super doggy” speed, almost caught
the yearling at the left hind quarter! Molly, my wife, and I
almost had venison! Molly would have had the first serving! I wish
that I could have had our video recorder! My mind's eye remembers!
Molly sleeps in her basement
“condominium” nightly, after having spent the evening inside with
us. About 6:30 AM, my wife fixes Molly's breakfast and sets her out
to “guard” our property. About 7:30 AM, I bring Molly her “front
porch snack.” She's usually there, with tail waging and ready!
Molly always give me a very intelligent look that says, “I love
you, man. Thanks for the breakfast snack!” A man and his dog help a
man endure the realities of life!
I use my hands, going against the
grain, to get “snow doggys” off Molly, in the warm weather. Twice
a day is best, morning and evening. She sheds (makes “snow
doggys”). I like to see the “snow doggys” pile into clumps in
the yard. They look like spots of snow.
Once Molly is inside, in the evenings,
she wants to, first, twirl around on the couch. I take off her “doggy
necklaces” (collars). Eventually, she goes to the kitchen for
“Molly waters,” to get a drink from her water bowl that we bring
in from either the garage or the front porch. After a while, once
Molly has gone out and back in the back/deck door and front/porch
door a time or two, it's time for Got-Ems!
The Got-Ems game is fun! I divide six
“favorite” treats into two, to make twelve, plus a “brush your
teeth doggy” biscuit. I count to Molly as I divide her treats.
I can't get Mrs. Appalachian Irishman
to video record Molly and me, playing the Got-Ems game! I've tried.
Imagine the following: I'm standing, with Got-Ems in hands, in the
living room, near the steps to Molly's basement condominium. Molly is
near my feet. She has “readies!” That is, eyes bright and looking
up. I toss up, just above her head, one Got-Em at a time, counting as
we go. Molly catches most. Sometimes, she has a “tooth bouncer”
that lands on the floor or goes down the stairwell (which I retrieve
for her). Number 12 is “finish strongly” final Got-Em, before
“brush your toothers” doggy biscuit. I don't know if Molly enjoys
Got-Ems game any better than I do! I catch Mrs. Appalachian Irishman
smiling at times. Video record us, dear! I had wanted to post the
I Had to Write This, Dear!
I had told Mrs. Appalachian Irishman
that I wouldn't write the following. Sorry, dear! I changed my mind!
On 5/27/2021, Thursday, I returned home
from working at the office. My wife had worked and beat me home. (Her
last work day was 6/1/2021. She's on summer break now. Oh, I must add
that summer started on 6/1/2021. It does NOT start on 6/20/2021. I
know. I can prove it. Ha!) The sun was out fully. I came in. Wife was
in kitchen. I said howdy. I noticed kitchen light on with blinds
still closed. (I'd left them closed, before driving to work, about
7:30 AM, to keep the sun from coming in the south side windows. The
sun was on the other side of the house now). I open all south side
window blinds. I turn off kitchen light. I turn off a lamp in the
living room. I wonder. I ask. Well, that was my mistake! I was just
“deviling you a bit,” dear!
On 6/2/2021, Tuesday, I was working at
home. My wife had her first day of summer vacation. She wanted to run
an errand. She couldn't find keys to our '08 Honda Civic that she
drives. Earlier, about 7:45 AM, I had noticed them on the passenger
side windshield area of the car, in the garage. (I'd been visiting
with Molly, before work.) I placed the keys, stealthily, in the
microwave – knowing what would happen eventually. About 11 AM,
while I'm working at home, my wife indicated her errand. Okay. She
looked for keys. She couldn't find keys. She looked in the garage. No
keys on or inside car. I took a work break. What are you doing, dear?
Trying to find your keys? Look in the microwave! Well, I got a smile
on that joke! She decided not to rake me across the coals that time!
I was lucky!
By the way, dear, this article is my
third one, since I “hid”
your anniversary card, on 5/16/2021.
Will you ever find it? Did you find it?
If so, has the “cat got your tongue?” I look forward to your
pithy comment – if you ever get around to it!
By the way, I love you, dear! If I
didn't, I wouldn't “devil you” with my humor as much! Thanks for
being the “long-suffering” Mrs. Appalachian Irishman.
Comedy is the best medicine. I use my
verbal and written artistic talent (i.e., my blarney) and sarcastic
sense of humor, as one way to endure the realities of life. Life is
good. Life is bad. It varies.
Use the everlasting perspective, to
place this temporal life into the context of everlasting life. That's
the best way to cope with the realities of life, when they are “not
too good,” as Hoyt would say, on John
Boy and Billy.
By the way, why do folks drive all that
way and do whatever they do to get tickets to the Smoky Mountain
bug show? No, they are NOT “fire flies!” I can watch
lightning bugs from our deck. Come on, man! (I thought that you might
like that as an ending.)